Skip to main content

Hospice is end-of-life care, and as such, can bring about lots of complex feelings. Visitors often come to hospice to “say goodbye” to a friend or relative, but is this sometimes inappropriate? The team at Suncrest Home Health and Hospice of Fremont has some advice for friends and relatives of hospice patients regarding visitors.

visitors to hospiceReconciling Differences with the Dying

Some lives are longer and more complicated than others. Some families are fraught with more tension and turmoil than others. As longtime veterans of the world of hospice care, we have seen a lot at Suncrest Home Health and Hospice, including friends and relatives who may have had feuds with the patient to reconcile their differences before the patient dies.

It sounds like a good idea, but is it really? If a hospice patient asks to see a friend or relative with the intention of burying the hatchet, that person can consider the request. But what about the visitor who comes to see a patient who is unawares? The patient might feel blindsided. They may not want to see the visitor. This may be disappointing to the visitor, who may even be insistent.

Stress Affects a Patient’s Prognosis

The truth is, even regular visitors who have good relationships with the patient can sometimes have less-than-ideal visits.

The most important thing to remember is the patient’s health. Any type of scene or disagreement can negatively affect the health of the patient. And the residual unpleasant feelings can last for days or even weeks, impacting the patient’s health.

All too often, friends and relatives of patients choose this time to unburden their soul and ask for forgiveness. But they must ask themselves if this is really fair.

Managing Visits in Hospice Care

If you are the gatekeeper for the patient — whether you’re a husband or wife, son or daughter, brother or sister or another relative — you may want to limit the patient’s visits with difficult friends or relatives that they never particularly got along well with.

Hospice care is meant to be peaceful, but there is necessarily almost always some stress involved, as there would be with anyone who is suffering with a terminal illness. They want to enjoy their last days and make the most of them — that’s why they chose hospice care. Allowing anything to get in the way of the sense of peace they have worked hard to achieve is not fair to the patient.

Suncrest of Fremont Can Help

The hospice nurses, social workers and therapists at Suncrest Home Health and Hospice of Fremont can help you with issues you’re struggling with regarding allowing visitors to see the patient in hospice care. This is a difficult time for you as well, and you need to practice self-care, reduce stress and just say no to insistent and obtrusive friends and relatives.

Contact us for advice and support regarding caring for friends and relatives in hospice care.